Jane Austen for boys:
A captain/surgeon bro-mance
Look! An albatross!
Monday, January 12, 2009
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Full Review: The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
I have been excited to see The Curious Case of Benjamin Button for weeks. The ads looked gorgeous, it has actors in it whom I can happily ogle watch for hours upon hours, I am generally a sucker for costume or period dramas (especially of the early 1900s sort), and yes... I had high hopes.
Honestly, I cannot remember the last time I was this disappointed in what could have been a very fine film. To put it simply: it is very capable, but it is entirely pointless. The acting is great, the set design is sumptuous, and overall it looks very good. Somewhere in the 17th hour of runtime, however, you realize that Benjamin is merely a flaccid foil for the much-more-interesting people around him, that Daisy is an annoying bitch, that your bum has gone numb, that your brain is going numb from the inane voice-overs (all done in a maddeningly slooooooooow monotone), and that even after all this time, all this exposition, you still know absolutely nothing about any of these characters. Nor are you all that interested in changing this fact.
Generally, the movie gives you no reason to care... and you know what? I followed its advice, and didn’t. For the last 45 minutes, maybe, it does finally hit its stride and for a bit actually offers you some kind of emotional incentive to pay attention... but it’s a pretty long slog to get there. And by that point I was almost too annoyed to care. The set-up (guy ages backwards) is a positively FASCINATING opportunity for a psychological case-study -- or at least some mention of how this defect affects one's conception of the world -- but no. That would be far too much depth.
That being said, Benjamin Button is very, very pretty to watch. It’s slow as hell and almost entirely brainless, but man, they must have spent a lot of money on its production. Even the smallest details are exquisite and well-composed. Whole tableaux are art-installations through which the camera wends, and the director (David Fincher, light years away from the tight, effective film-making of Seven) clearly has fun with emulating an old-film “look” and the nostalgic nuances sepia tone can bring. Too bad, then, that the people and actions that fill up this beautiful space are so vacant.
If you are in the mood for gorgeous, easy-to-ignore background noise, Benjamin Button works quite well (file it next to Girl With the Pearl Earring, Snow Falling on Cedars and The New World in that category). It’s just not that compelling as a piece of cinema worth focusing on.
This gets my award for “Biggest Frickin’ Disappointment Of The Year”. Good job!
5/10
PS: For Pitt oglers, the scenes where the special effects manage to anti-age him back to his A River Runs Through It young gorgeousness are quite a treat. To refresh your memory. Gosh, that man was pretty.
Honestly, I cannot remember the last time I was this disappointed in what could have been a very fine film. To put it simply: it is very capable, but it is entirely pointless. The acting is great, the set design is sumptuous, and overall it looks very good. Somewhere in the 17th hour of runtime, however, you realize that Benjamin is merely a flaccid foil for the much-more-interesting people around him, that Daisy is an annoying bitch, that your bum has gone numb, that your brain is going numb from the inane voice-overs (all done in a maddeningly slooooooooow monotone), and that even after all this time, all this exposition, you still know absolutely nothing about any of these characters. Nor are you all that interested in changing this fact.
Generally, the movie gives you no reason to care... and you know what? I followed its advice, and didn’t. For the last 45 minutes, maybe, it does finally hit its stride and for a bit actually offers you some kind of emotional incentive to pay attention... but it’s a pretty long slog to get there. And by that point I was almost too annoyed to care. The set-up (guy ages backwards) is a positively FASCINATING opportunity for a psychological case-study -- or at least some mention of how this defect affects one's conception of the world -- but no. That would be far too much depth.
That being said, Benjamin Button is very, very pretty to watch. It’s slow as hell and almost entirely brainless, but man, they must have spent a lot of money on its production. Even the smallest details are exquisite and well-composed. Whole tableaux are art-installations through which the camera wends, and the director (David Fincher, light years away from the tight, effective film-making of Seven) clearly has fun with emulating an old-film “look” and the nostalgic nuances sepia tone can bring. Too bad, then, that the people and actions that fill up this beautiful space are so vacant.
If you are in the mood for gorgeous, easy-to-ignore background noise, Benjamin Button works quite well (file it next to Girl With the Pearl Earring, Snow Falling on Cedars and The New World in that category). It’s just not that compelling as a piece of cinema worth focusing on.
This gets my award for “Biggest Frickin’ Disappointment Of The Year”. Good job!
5/10
PS: For Pitt oglers, the scenes where the special effects manage to anti-age him back to his A River Runs Through It young gorgeousness are quite a treat. To refresh your memory. Gosh, that man was pretty.
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Best of 2008 list
2008 was an odd year for movies. I watched a lot of them, I enjoyed many of them, and a disturbing number of them evanesced out of my consciousness the minute I walked out of the theatre. Therefore, coming up with a Best Of list has been interesting... but I think I’ve been able to at least pare down the list a bit.
1. No ifs, ands, or buts about it, Slumdog Millionaire was the best movie I’ve seen this year. It whumped me in a way that movies don’t often do, which I was not expecting at all. The reviews that I’d read prior to having watched it made it sound facilely cute and I saw multiple blurbs for it being the “feel-good film of the year”. I’ll give you a little warning: it’s not. Not in the traditional “2 hours of warm fuzzies” kind of way. It’s brutal, hard to watch, and seriously heart-breaking... but the payoff is the most amazing endorphin rush I have ever experienced. And so you walk out of the theatre crying, yet walking on air. It’s an electrifying feeling. And one I recommend whole-heartedly to everyone.
2. Rachel Getting Married is not a feel-good film. It is frustrating, depressing, and (if you have ever acted in any way like Kym, or had a sister, brother, friend like her) strangely, compellingly embarrassing. Anne Hathaway is utterly light-years away from her Princess Diaries persona and god, is she good. And by “good”, I mean “powerful”, “terrifying”, and “oh, so self-destructively tragic”. I’m usually not a big one for dysfunctional family dramas, but I was struck dumb with awe by this film.
3. Hellboy II is my pick for “totally awesome popcorn flick of the year”. Yes, it’s a graphic-novel-based action movie (and a sequel, at that!), but it’s visually stunning, terrifically clever, and features some of the most beautiful CG work this side of Lord of the Rings. Generally I am a whore for anything Guillermo Del Toro does, admittedly, but this manages to keep the visual splendor of Pan’s Labyrinth intact while being much more emotionally palatable than that film (yes, I felt emotionally abused by that film -- it just cut a LITTLE too deep). It’s some of the most genuine fun that have ever had at a fantasy-action movie; a feat made possible both by the ogle-worthy visuals and the hammy charm of the cast (in especial, Ron Perlman as our eponymous hero).
4. Happy-Go-Lucky is a bit like a stew: when first consumed it’s good, but not mindblowing. Let it steep a day and go back to it, though, it’s amazing. The story of a by-hook-or-by-crook optimist, this British import is one of those rare films that actually gets better the more you think about it and mull over just how complicated the simple story and its characters really are. It’s one of the more fascinating character studies I’ve seen in recent years, and one that deserves to be sought out by more viewers. PS: I do not recommend seeing Rachel Getting Married and this back to back (as I made the mistake of doing). The rollercoaster of conflicting emotions and convergence of strong female characters is a bit overwhelming.
5. The Orphanage/ El Orfanato is going on this list because it is a near-perfect study of horror. I will never watch it again, but I can still respect it for its elegance, its emotional power, and the fact that it scared the bejeebers out of me for days. It’s one of the few horror films that somehow still makes you want to cry with compassion -- yes, it’s terrifying (even the opening credits are supremely creepy), but it’s somehow terrifically sad. You genuinely care for the characters and by the time the denouement comes around, it’s heartbreaking. Anthony Lane, in the New Yorker, has a great article on it here. He’s more eloquent than I could ever hope to be.
6. Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist. I dare you to find a movie containing more enthusiasm and dippy fun than this aimed-at-teens-but-smart-enough-for-adults romp. It also gets my “Sweetest Sex Scene” award. Who knew that handjobs could be so damn romantic?
7. Forgetting Sarah Marshall. It’s not going to win many awards, but man, it was funny and heartfelt and a damn good watch.
8. Burn After Reading. This gets my “WTF Moment of the Year” award... and somehow manages to win it multiple times. Brad Pitt is pure awesome.
9. Iron Man. Robert Downey Jr. rocking the hell out of what could have been a pedestrian superhero-comics movie adaptation. Yes, please.
10. Dark Knight. Yea, yea, everyone else has listed this, too. The Batman franchise really should just shut down after this film -- there’s no way you’re going to top it. It’s going to be sad to see them try.
1. No ifs, ands, or buts about it, Slumdog Millionaire was the best movie I’ve seen this year. It whumped me in a way that movies don’t often do, which I was not expecting at all. The reviews that I’d read prior to having watched it made it sound facilely cute and I saw multiple blurbs for it being the “feel-good film of the year”. I’ll give you a little warning: it’s not. Not in the traditional “2 hours of warm fuzzies” kind of way. It’s brutal, hard to watch, and seriously heart-breaking... but the payoff is the most amazing endorphin rush I have ever experienced. And so you walk out of the theatre crying, yet walking on air. It’s an electrifying feeling. And one I recommend whole-heartedly to everyone.
2. Rachel Getting Married is not a feel-good film. It is frustrating, depressing, and (if you have ever acted in any way like Kym, or had a sister, brother, friend like her) strangely, compellingly embarrassing. Anne Hathaway is utterly light-years away from her Princess Diaries persona and god, is she good. And by “good”, I mean “powerful”, “terrifying”, and “oh, so self-destructively tragic”. I’m usually not a big one for dysfunctional family dramas, but I was struck dumb with awe by this film.
3. Hellboy II is my pick for “totally awesome popcorn flick of the year”. Yes, it’s a graphic-novel-based action movie (and a sequel, at that!), but it’s visually stunning, terrifically clever, and features some of the most beautiful CG work this side of Lord of the Rings. Generally I am a whore for anything Guillermo Del Toro does, admittedly, but this manages to keep the visual splendor of Pan’s Labyrinth intact while being much more emotionally palatable than that film (yes, I felt emotionally abused by that film -- it just cut a LITTLE too deep). It’s some of the most genuine fun that have ever had at a fantasy-action movie; a feat made possible both by the ogle-worthy visuals and the hammy charm of the cast (in especial, Ron Perlman as our eponymous hero).
4. Happy-Go-Lucky is a bit like a stew: when first consumed it’s good, but not mindblowing. Let it steep a day and go back to it, though, it’s amazing. The story of a by-hook-or-by-crook optimist, this British import is one of those rare films that actually gets better the more you think about it and mull over just how complicated the simple story and its characters really are. It’s one of the more fascinating character studies I’ve seen in recent years, and one that deserves to be sought out by more viewers. PS: I do not recommend seeing Rachel Getting Married and this back to back (as I made the mistake of doing). The rollercoaster of conflicting emotions and convergence of strong female characters is a bit overwhelming.
5. The Orphanage/ El Orfanato is going on this list because it is a near-perfect study of horror. I will never watch it again, but I can still respect it for its elegance, its emotional power, and the fact that it scared the bejeebers out of me for days. It’s one of the few horror films that somehow still makes you want to cry with compassion -- yes, it’s terrifying (even the opening credits are supremely creepy), but it’s somehow terrifically sad. You genuinely care for the characters and by the time the denouement comes around, it’s heartbreaking. Anthony Lane, in the New Yorker, has a great article on it here. He’s more eloquent than I could ever hope to be.
6. Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist. I dare you to find a movie containing more enthusiasm and dippy fun than this aimed-at-teens-but-smart-enough-for-adults romp. It also gets my “Sweetest Sex Scene” award. Who knew that handjobs could be so damn romantic?
7. Forgetting Sarah Marshall. It’s not going to win many awards, but man, it was funny and heartfelt and a damn good watch.
8. Burn After Reading. This gets my “WTF Moment of the Year” award... and somehow manages to win it multiple times. Brad Pitt is pure awesome.
9. Iron Man. Robert Downey Jr. rocking the hell out of what could have been a pedestrian superhero-comics movie adaptation. Yes, please.
10. Dark Knight. Yea, yea, everyone else has listed this, too. The Batman franchise really should just shut down after this film -- there’s no way you’re going to top it. It’s going to be sad to see them try.
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Point-by-Point: Near Dark 6/10
A young cowboy-type immediately falls for a girl he sees at the local drug store. Turns out she's a vampire, and quickly makes him one. He's forced to join her gang and must either adapt to the new lifestyle or die. Well, die again.
The Good: The movie has lots of style and an interesting cast of characters. The story is interesting if only because it addresses vapirism as a disease - you're still you, you're just superstrong, can't die, are allergic to sunlight and need blood to live. Plus, I always like Lance Henrikson, who plays the head of the vampire clan.
The Bad: There are a few ridiculous events that just make you wish the writer wasn't quite so lazy. The acting is a bit over-the-top, but it's a vampire movie, so it's to be expected.
The Ugly: The vampires have a tendency to catch fire while outside in the sun. But it's a slow burn, so think charcol more than POOF.
Points Pondered
The Good: The movie has lots of style and an interesting cast of characters. The story is interesting if only because it addresses vapirism as a disease - you're still you, you're just superstrong, can't die, are allergic to sunlight and need blood to live. Plus, I always like Lance Henrikson, who plays the head of the vampire clan.
The Bad: There are a few ridiculous events that just make you wish the writer wasn't quite so lazy. The acting is a bit over-the-top, but it's a vampire movie, so it's to be expected.
The Ugly: The vampires have a tendency to catch fire while outside in the sun. But it's a slow burn, so think charcol more than POOF.
Points Pondered
- The vampire life is a bit more realistically portrayed than the uber-romantacised stuff of Anne Rice. Really, these are killers who are constantly on the lam. They must murder to eat, and convince themselves they're not human to do so.
- I'm not sure I buy blood transfusion as a cure to being a vampire.
- The clan gets into a shoot out with perhaps the most inept police department ever. If you see a bad guy making a run for a car, you should probably disable the vehicle.
- Apparently vampires prefer shaved victims. Seems fair.
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
Point by Point: The Proposition 7/10
A bandit (Guy Pearce) and his little brother are in jail, but the chief of police makes him a deal: He'll let them go free if he goes into the outback and kills his older brother, who's basically a sadistic yet smart jerk. He accepts, because otherwise this would be a short film.
The Good: The setting is simultaneously harsh and beautiful, very much by design. Glorious shots of the Australian wilderness show just how barren it can be. The acting is top-notch, although it takes a few minutes to get an ear for everyone's accents.
The Bad: There are a fair amount of "this is important" cinematography, which can be a little overbearing. The meandering pace accented with brutal violence may definitely throw some people.
The Ugly: It's never fun to watch someone lashed, but the winner here is the townfolk - they got a lot of butt-ugly people to stand around and look cross.
Points Pondered
The Good: The setting is simultaneously harsh and beautiful, very much by design. Glorious shots of the Australian wilderness show just how barren it can be. The acting is top-notch, although it takes a few minutes to get an ear for everyone's accents.
The Bad: There are a fair amount of "this is important" cinematography, which can be a little overbearing. The meandering pace accented with brutal violence may definitely throw some people.
The Ugly: It's never fun to watch someone lashed, but the winner here is the townfolk - they got a lot of butt-ugly people to stand around and look cross.
Points Pondered
- If you don't like flies, you should probably avoid Australia.
- Ray Whinstone does not quite look as fit as he did in Beowulf. I think he probably got some CG help with his abs. Just maybe.
- I bet that if you recite a line from a poem after being shot, and the guy that shot you enthusiastically continues the quote, it's of little solace.
- Are you still allowed to call it a Western if it takes place in Australia? Does it get a funny name, like Kangaroo Western?
Monday, July 14, 2008
Point by Point: National Treasure: Book of Secrets 4/10
Basically the plot is the exact same as the first movie, only this time treasure hunter Nicolas Cage is searching for the lost city of gold, the location of which is hidden in the Presidential Book of Secrets. If you haven't seen the first one, think Da Vinci Code. If you've missed all 3, you are a lucky person indeed.
The Good: As with the first movie, the sole fun comes from the historically based treasure hunt. Sure, it's absolutely improbable and does a number on the facts, but it's a halfway entertaining idea. And Justin Bartha as Cage's cohort is again the only worthwhile character, adding some actual funny moments to an otherwise ponderous movie.
The Bad: Trying to follow the leaps of logic required to solve the "clues" given will just lead to headaches. And even if you leave your brain in the other room, the non-villian villain, the boring action and the worst performance by a multi-Oscar winning cast since Virtuosity means this is one to avoid.
The Ugly: Nic Cage's haircut. There is no reason he has to look so stupid.
Points Pondered
The Good: As with the first movie, the sole fun comes from the historically based treasure hunt. Sure, it's absolutely improbable and does a number on the facts, but it's a halfway entertaining idea. And Justin Bartha as Cage's cohort is again the only worthwhile character, adding some actual funny moments to an otherwise ponderous movie.
The Bad: Trying to follow the leaps of logic required to solve the "clues" given will just lead to headaches. And even if you leave your brain in the other room, the non-villian villain, the boring action and the worst performance by a multi-Oscar winning cast since Virtuosity means this is one to avoid.
The Ugly: Nic Cage's haircut. There is no reason he has to look so stupid.
Points Pondered
- If there really was a President's Book of Secrets, I'd run for the office on the platform of letting everyone know all the cool stuff about Area 51, the JFK assassination, etc. I would win in a landslide. And then I would mysteriously and tragically accidentally strangle myself while tying my shoe.
- It's hard to accuse an Oscar winner of slumming when he was once in Anaconda. Sorry Jon Voight. Oh, and your daughter is really hot.
- Ed Harris was an awesome not-quite-a-villain bad guy in The Rock. Here, he just sucks.
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